One of my best buddies is currently studying engineering in one of the most wretched places (that is what she thinks). Yellow and brown are two colours that she hates with a lot of gusto. It’s no use reasoning with her because she is mental. Period. When she was a little girl she used to abhor the sun because of the above mentioned reason.
A letter I wrote to her in hopes of cheering her up-
“Hi Ducky,
Let’s pretend for some time that everything around you changes to yellow and you are the only brown person with huge chunky Gold ear-rings alive in the universe. The people and animals around you have yellow hair, yellow teeth, yellow saliva, yellow snort, yellow pimples… you get the idea don’t you?
(I hope I have grossed you out, ha)
Ah so, then because you are the only brown person alive, all the people decide to wage a war against you to terminate you, so that no yellow man falls for your brownie charm and then both of you produce yellow brown hybrids(kids). That would be a catastrophe for the yellow people the yellow people don’t want that happening, coz you are somebody who would make their race impure.
But… you are the most slickest brownie alive. (this is because you have survived up till now). You don’t want to die coz it is your duty to populate the yellow earth with yellow brown hybrids coz it is the only way that you can achieve ‘Brown Nirvana’ and the Brown Gods would elevate you to the position of ‘SUPREME BROWNIE OF YELLOW BROWN HYBRID RACE’.
Now power means everything to you and you won’t stop at anything to meet your goals.
So now you have survived so many upheavals, what do you do?
Simple, you do yellow meditation! And by the powers granted to you, you temporarily turn yourself into a yellow being. You embrace the yellow people and tell them that you are actually one of them.( But only I can see through your plans, you slimy brownie).
Anyways, the yellows welcome you top their fold and you become one of them.
AND THEN----------
You start producing yellow brown hybrids.
The yellows now realize that you are actually an imposter, so they all come running behind you with yellow swords. But the Brown Gods realize that you are in danger and at that moment the yellow heavens open up and you rise upwards in a swirl of yellow dust.
And thus, you meet your goals and become
‘SUPREME BROWNIE OF YELLOW BROWN HYBRIDS’
You now achieve ‘Brown Nirvana’ and thus live in a bliss of yellow and brown, governing your yellow brown hybrids.
Thus your ultimate yellow brown fantasy got fulfilled.
OK now you can stop pretending that you are brown and the rest of the world is yellow. Instead you can pretend that sunflowers are growing out of your hair. He, he.”
I think my friend is going to hate me for the rest of my life.
